Fox has a new reality show coming up this Fall called Utopia. On their website they describe it as, “television’s biggest social experiment.” The premise of the show, and please know this description is not mine but Fox’s is, “Fifteen pioneering Americans leave their everyday lives and move to an isolated, undeveloped location – for an entire year – where they are challenged to create their own civilization from scratch.” Okay first of all, dramatic much? Secondly, pioneering? Really? 15 morons who want to ride this generation’s wave of stupidity of being famous for the sake of being famous makes them pioneers? I mean obviously it’s true. When this show is over we’re sure to hear Americans utter phrases like, “Abraham Lincoln who? He’s a nobody compared to that guy from Utopia.” Let’s further analyze the description of the shows premise. The “pioneers” will be moving to an isolated and undeveloped location so basically anywhere in the united States besides New York City, Boston, Chicago and a couple of other cities. If I had to guess where they’ll be living I’d guess Montana. I’m pretty sure the population there is about 6, far higher than Nebraska whose population has risen to 14 in recent years. Okay, so they’ll be in an undeveloped location for a year and building their own civilization from scratch? Does this sound like a really long camping trip to anybody? I’m guessing most of the show will be focused on who gathers the sticks to roast marshmallows. Wasn’t this also the premise of Survivor, another reality show I’ve never seen? Anyway, here’s my main problem with the show. In the commercials, the contestants and the guy narrating are talking about forming a government and other things of that nature. There are 15 people there. Are they going to hold an election? Are they going to go door to door canvassing to the other 14 “citizens”? A young Asian woman in the commercial proudly declares “I don’t believe in monogamy.” Okay darling, you’re going to be with the same 14 people for a year so monogamy will likely be your only option you foolish girl unless of course you guys make it like a sick nudist, Hedonism type society. This idea is so stupid, it hurts my brain. What’s even worse is that I know a trillion people are going to watch it. It’s going to be all the rage, the topic of water cooler conversations in every office in America. The only part of the commercial I did find entertaining was when a young man says, “I wonder how many guns I should bring” followed by an old bearded guy saying, “I don’t think we should have any guns.” I really hope the young guy wins that argument a month into taping, the “society” divides into two groups of seven and a half, they have a civil war, and all end up getting shot. No more Utopia! Whoo!
Article By: Jon DaBove
