As far as relationships go, one of the hardest to maintain is the “friends with benefits”. On paper it’s a dream come true. You get to have sex with somebody, watch TV with them, eat pizza, and all those other things that friends do but at the end of the day you go home. You have no responsibility past having sex with them and being their friend. You don’t need to meet the other person’s parents. You don’t need to take them out on Valentine’s Day. You don’t need to buy them gifts. Perfect, right? Absolutely wrong. I’m pretty sure that in the history of man there have been about three successful cases of a “friends with benefits” relationship. I mean, let’s be honest, this thing is doomed from the moment you enter into the situation. First of all, it’s essentially a relationship where you’re telling somebody, “Okay, you’re cool enough to hang out with and have sex with but there’s something missing so I’m going to continue my search whilst you feed my sexual desires.” Does that sound like it’s not going to end tragically? Secondly, one person is always more invested because they like you more than you like them. Why the hell else would they enter this type of arrangement? It’s a sucker’s bet but they hope it’s going to turn into something more. This is why one person finds themself bringing chicken soup to you in the middle of the night because you have a cold while you tell her you can’t see a movie because you have a date already. There is no equality in a “friends with benefits” situation. It’s one person taking advantage of another person because they’re into them. Thirdly, sex is a dangerous thing. It’s an intimate act; most of us don’t treat it as such but still. How do you think it’s going to go over when a girl who blew you twice last night asks you to help her move and you tell her you can’t because you’re watching football? A “friends with benefits” relationship is one person leading another person on with permission. A lot of people try and set ground rules when they enter such an arrangement to avoid problems. They do not work. If somebody tells you they’re going to punch you in the face before they do it, it still hurts. In conclusion, “friends with benefits” is always a disaster waiting to happen. One person is always going to want more than the other is willing to give despite any pre-arrangement discussions that may have been had. Somebody always ends up getting hurt and is that really worth it? You’re better off just being friends and not having sex. If you need the sex that badly then just become a couple because you’re going to be dealing with the same amount of stress anyway. “Friends with benefits” is also a breeding ground for women scorned type issues and who the hell needs that mess? It’s a serious pain in the ass so unless Danielle Fishel finds your home address, shows up at your door, and demands you be her friend with benefits do yourself a favor and stick to one night stands and good old fashioned dating.
Article By: Jon DaBove
