Charles Barkley is a lot of things. He’s a legendary basketball player. He’s an NBA commentator. He’s a spokesman. He’s a larger than life personality and an overall funny guy. From the beginning of his career Charles Barkley made it a point to never hold back. He’s spit on fans. He’s cursed people out, you name it. He’s in the Hall of Fame for professional athlete faux pas. Like with most men, Charles has mellowed over the years meaning he hasn’t done anything in the realm of spitting at anybody for a long time. Add to that the fact that his past is littered with bar brawls and the like people have become immune Charles’ comments. After all they’re just words and he’s Charles Barkley so we’re getting off easy. This allows Charles to make some of the greatest comments ever uttered by man. They make not be politically correct, they may be harsh, but there’s truth in most of what he says and you can never fault a man for telling the truth. Barkley is an entertaining guy to say the least. We gathered 15 of his gems so you can see why he’s the funniest dude in NBA history.
“I can be bought. If they paid me enough, I’d work for the Klan.”
“You got to believe in yourself. Hell, I believe I’m the best-looking guy in the world and I might be right.”
“We better not be doing the Bulls this year. Man, they suck! Bunch of high school kids with $70 million contracts. Damn! I hate my mother for having me too soon.”
“You can talk without saying a thing. I don’t ever want to be that type of person.”
“Almost all those politicians took money from Enron, and there they are holding hearings. That’s like O.J. Simpson getting in the Rae Carruth jury pool.”
“That is starting to hurt my feelings. I don’t mind skinny people making fun of me, we all do that, but I don’t want fat people making fun of me.”
“We are in the business of kicking butt and business is very, very good.”
“I remember sitting down with the Rockets and saying, ‘Yeah. I’m going to retire.’ They said, ‘Well, we’ll give you $9 million.’ And I said, ‘You got a pen on you?'”
“If you go out with a girl and they say she has a great personality, she’s ugly. If they tell you a guy works hard, he can’t play a lick. Same thing.”
“They don’t let many black people in the governor’s mansion in Alabama, unless they’re cleaning.”
“All I know is, as long as I led the Southeastern Conference in scoring, my grades would be fine.”
“I always laugh when people ask me about rebounding techniques. I’ve got a technique. It’s called just go get the damn ball.”
“Well, when I went off to college, the guys I used to hang with were pumping gas and voting Democrat. Today they’re still pumping gas and voting Democrat. Guess the Democrats didn’t do much for them.”
“When I was recruited at Auburn, they took me to a strip joint. When I saw those titties on Buffy, I knew that Auburn met my academic requirements.”
“I’d never buy my girl a watch; she’s already got a clock over the stove.”
Article By: Jon DaBove
